Aliens Want Money Tycoon Infinite Money And Gems -

Zorp sighed, tossed a handful of flawless diamonds at a passing pigeon, and said, "Now? Now we open a ."

Zorp was the worst invasion commander in the Andromeda Galaxy. While other aliens brought death rays, Zorp brought a .

Then came the . Zorp didn't care for Earth diamonds; they were too small. He used a tractor beam to pull a literal asteroid made of solid emerald into low Earth orbit. He began "mining" it by simply shaking it until giant green rocks rained down into his backyard. ALIENS WANT MONEY TYCOON INFINITE MONEY AND GEMS

But Zorp wanted . He built the "Super-Magnet ATM," a device that beamed every stray penny and forgotten nickel on Earth directly into his vault. The gold reserves of Fort Knox were teleported into his basement to be used as doorstops.

He realized that vaporizing Earth was bad for business. Instead, he landed his saucer in the middle of Times Square, opened the hatch, and put up a neon sign: Zorp sighed, tossed a handful of flawless diamonds

Soon, Zorp had so much wealth that money lost all meaning. He started using $100 bills as napkins and rubies as gravel for his driveway. He sat on a throne made of compressed platinum, looking at his screen which simply read: .

The scheme was simple. He sold "Intergalactic Pet Rocks" (just glowing moon pebbles) and charged $1,000 for a five-minute ride in a zero-gravity chair. The humans loved it. Within an hour, Zorp had enough cash to buy a small island. Within a day, he bought Google. Then came the

"Commander," his second-in-command whispered, "we have all the money and gems in the universe. What do we do now?"